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Yahoo Mail's Lame and Inappropriate Clip Art

Skipjack Bonito's picture

From the Pointless Nitpicking Dept:

I use Yahoo! Mail on a near-daily basis. Like many corporate, family-friendly tryhard sites, the splash page features cutesy stock photos of happy-looking people in order to draw in customers.

You know the type: clean-nosed kiddies of varied ethnic origins; cute blonde girls in modest, logo-free outfits; and of course, a couple of lovable and decidedly non-rabid dogs. This is supposed to create a human (or canine) connection with the service — regardless of the service.

But logging in today, I couldn't help but notice how incongruous and plain stupid the pictures looked in relation to the messages they're conveying. Like, someone clearly didn't even spend five minutes trying to match their royalty-free snapshots to their rotating banners.

Have a look for yourself...



killwhitey.jpg
This woman is not making friends. This woman is giving this man a spinning backhand to the face and he is clearly doubled over in intense pain. It looks like an outtake from Kill Bill: Beach Party! What the hell?


eatthatshit.jpg
Terrible with names? Use Address Book. Terrible with motor control? Have your friend blithely stuff pizza into your face, while callously laughing at you. (Another nitpick: Is it really necessary to call attention to your Address Book feature? What's next, an ad campaign for the "Send" button?)


viraltongue.jpg
Personally, I'd prefer protection again whatever the hell virus turned this poor woman's tongue blood-red, thanks very much.


kidemail.jpg
Wow. Kid Rock's
career really went downhill after his ass got dumped by Pamela Anderson. Looks like he's finally off the drugs, at least. Word.



jamespink.jpg
Wow. James Brown's career really went downhill ever since he became a white man. A creepy, dead white man.


halfman.jpg
While we're on the subject, why is it the only brothers you see in ads always gotta have those silly braids? And, um...half a face? Does whitey find it less threatening? Huh?! That it? Cracka-ass honky.


worktowel.jpg
Tell me, exactly what "work messages" is she supposed to be getting? In this girl's world, it's forbidden for women to learn how to read and write, much less look for a job. And the punishment for breaking these rules? Death by stoning. Yahoo...have you no sense of decency?


oldfart.jpg
The obvious comment here is, More like old fart! But seriously, this guy looks less like an ex-lover than the old pervert who's cyberstalking your teenage daughter. I'm not sold.

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