iLaugh.com

The Internet is still reeling from the news of a new record in long-term ecstasy consumption — this man took 40,000 tablets over a period of nine years! Dude must've gone through more pacifiers than Maggie Simpson!
Now, we here at iLaugh condemn the use of illegal narcotics — because we're in Canada, and buy most of our pot from local cops.

But we're especially concerned about this case study in MDMA addiction, not because of the subject's recurring paranoia and hallucinations, not because of his many near-fatal collapses while under the influence and not even because he was still feeling the effects of the drug months after finally kicking the habit.

No, we're concerned because nowhere in this study is there any mention of all this ecstasy resulting in the subject getting any...

I mean, if you're not in the scene just to get some cheap feels from some barely-legal raver kid, what the hell's the point? What, you "like the music"? My ass!