iLaugh.com

We've got one thing to say to you, Ghyslain Raza: You blew it.

Yes, your little wiener friends were wrong to take that video of you dancing around with a broomstick like it was a lightsaber and then post it on the Internet; and yet in so doing they made you a star, giving you a title with the kind of instant recognition that most camwhores would kill for — The Star Wars Kid.

But instead of enjoying that free ride to fame and fortune that only America can deliver, you went instead for an out-of-court cash settlement — in measly Canadian dollars no less!

The Globe & Mail quotes your barely comprehensible whining:
"It was simply unbearable, totally. It was impossible to attend class...other students would jump on tables and chant, ‘Star Wars Kid! Star Wars Kid!'"

Like that's a bad thing?

Think for a moment about those dorkus-malorkus friends of yours who started all this. Not exactly household names, are they? But you, Ghyslain...apple of the Internet's super-panoptic eye, you are. Milked this thing for all it was worth, could you have! Writing like Yoda
talks, are we!

At the bare minimum you could have eked out a comfortable living on the convention circuit. Sure, you'd have to recreate that embarrassing, jiggle-tastic lightsaber routine for adoring Star Wars fans in airport hotel ballrooms across the country. But at least you'd get paid for it — not to mention all the exercise you'd get.

If you ever tired of life on the road, you could always throw a telephone at some unsuspecting hotel staffer, get yourself some tabloid headlines, make a public apology on Dr. Phil and start the whole cycle all over again!

With a little more ambition and timing you could have even snagged yourself a sweet cameo in the last Star Wars movie, like one of young Jedis that Anakin Skywalker assassinates, or even better, snatched the very role of Anakin away from Hayden Christensen - hey, if you can furrow your brow and mutter, "I hate them...I hate them all" ad absurdum, then you've got our vote!

You know, once upon a time, in a millennium far, far away, there was this guy named Mahir who rocketed to fame thanks to three simple words on his homepage:

I KISS YOU !!!!!

Those words got him a free trip to America and all the kisses his cheeks could stand. Beyond your measly payout, what exactly have you got, Ghyslain?